Friday, May 20, 2011

Two Dumb Dames and a Good for nothing GPS...

Okay, so my BFF ~ Carol Barrett ~ graduated from Sand Springs Beauty College on April 6, 2011 this year as a Nail Tech... now comes the time to take her state boards in Oklahoma City and who else should go with her to be her demonstration dummy but me!

She decided we should go to the City and stay at a hotel near the testing location the night before the boards. She found a room at a Best Western just 4 1/2 - 5 miles away from there.  She got a great room with two queen beds and a complimentary full breakfast bar.  The other perk was the dry sauna and a bubbling hot tub... ahhhhh!  Who knew we would NEED THAT so badly!!!

The day before we were to leave for the City, she had me come to "Healing Hands Massage Therapy and Day Spa" in Sand Springs (her mama's business) where Carol is working in her nail business.  She wanted to do a mock board on my hands to get a feel for how long it would actually take her.  When we were done with that we talked about what time we wanted to leave the next day.  T's crossed and I's dotted...our plan was set.

She had several errands to run before leaving Tulsa and would call me when she was ready to head out.  I would pick her up and we would be on our way.  With me driving to Oklahoma City she could study in the car or just relax.  We decided to make a quick stop at a convenience store in Sapulpa for a light snack before entering the Will Rogers Turnpike gate at 2:45pm.  

We had a good time visiting and laughing on the way to OKC and after about an hour and a half found our self coming up on the three way split in the highway as you enter the city.  As I approached I said to Carol, "Which road do I take?" and she answered, "I'm not sure."  Which struck us both funny.  We had been so excited about going that we had not even looked at the address or mapped out the route.  I told you... two dumb dames...

I pulled the car off the road onto the shoulder and asked her for the address which she said she had committed to memory... uh what?... feeling confident in her ability to memorize, I typed the information into the search bar of the GPS on my iPhone 3GS.  This is also the very same phone I have dropped on the ground about a dozen times.  It promptly displayed the BLUE DOT showing our location, the RED PIN showing our destination and the PURPLE LINE showing our route.  Easy right?  Feeling even more confident... we pressed on... 

My first mistake, unknown to me, was to hand the map to Carol... you would think that after being best friends with someone for over 15 years I would know that... CAROL CANNOT READ A MAP!!!  Of course she said nary a word to me... her driver... about this unfortunate shortcoming for the next two hours as we took first one alternate highway exchange after another causing my pike pass to chime like bells in a cathedral tower at high noon.  In fact she didn't tell me about it until... well... keep reading... I'll tell you later when she decided I needed to know this very vital piece of information... 

Every time we took yet another exchange she would say... "We're not on the purple line anymore", then the blue dot would hop back on it and she would say... "Oops, never mind, we're still on the purple line" and we would laugh so hard we would almost cry.  With out exception when we would veer off in blind obedience to the purple line we would find ourselves to be going in the opposite direction and have to turn around and head the other way.  

We have no idea how it happened, it is a mystery to us both, but after driving for a little over 2 hours in absolute and total hypnotic allegiance to the purple line we suddenly found ourselves on the turnpike exchange headed back... yes, you guessed it, to Tulsa... and trust me when I say... once you are at that point on the road, you're committed, there is no turning back... we soon learned there isn't a single turn around for the next 40 miles!!! 

Finally, after traveling half way back to Tulsa, we spot our first chance to turn around... exiting the turnpike we hear the all too familiar sound... another beep on the pike pass, traveling down the road looking for a way back on, there it was... I had just entered the on ramp taking us back to the City and occurred to me we had better pull over and recheck our situation and re-evaluate the map... now this is when she decided to pipe up and tell me that she can't read a map!!! This would have been valuable information to me 2.5 hours ago!!!  Of course this also explains why she kept screaming "I hate you... I hate you" to my phone.  She then turned to me and said, "I do much better with written directions"... well DUH!!!  I said, "Are you sure you have the address right?  Maybe you better look it up and call them to be sure they don't give our room away."  I handed her my phone and she does a search and found the hotel and guess what?... we had been looking for the wrong address the whole time!  She said, "Well I was mostly right."  Oh my... we were laughing so hard by then I could not even drive the car.  

I took the phone, entered the CORRECT ADDRESS into the phones GPS and recalculated our route.  Once I did that, I pulled up the written direction and handed the phone back to Carol and started out once again for the City.  Our new directions took us straight to the mall... are you kidding me??? unspeakable and full of glory!  You would think it somehow knew we were women!  "Okay, enough is enough, call the hotel... tell them where we are and ask them how to get there from here."  We took off again and honestly, we only had to call them about three more times before we actually found it.  At 6:40pm we finally arrived at the hotel just 4 hours after leaving Tulsa.  Hooray!!!  Wait, what's that up ahead???  This is almost to embarrassing to even mention!!!  The hotel was only about two blocks off I-40.  We could not believe it!  I think we set a new record!  I jokingly said to Carol, "it only took a 1/16 of a tank of gas to drive to the City but additional two tanks of gas to find the hotel!" 

Well next time I'll know... DON'T GIVE CAROL A MAP!  That is if you expect to find anything!  We will laugh about this for years to come I am certain.  I am also sure it is probably much funnier to the both of us than to anyone else.  I told her after this trip she will be driving and I will be doing the navigating.  Geezzz!  What a trip.

I must say, once we got to our room, and after we enjoyed a soak in the hot tub and relaxed a bit, we had time to reflect.  We decided that if we had started out on our trip with prayer and asked the Holy Spirit to direct our path we would not have had quite the adventure we ended up having.  That evening before going to bed Carol reviewed for the boards while I sat down with my laptop and on MapQuest  I charted our route for tomorrow to the state board headquarters, and from there, back to Tulsa. Not taking any chances on the route home. LOL  Oh, I almost forgot to mention on the night we arrived it started pouring down rain.  We got in our suits and had to run across this opening between our room and the pool area.  Then had to run back to our room in the rain when we were done, but even so, the hot tub was amazing and Loren... I want one! 

Carol reviewing for the Oklahoma State Boards 
The next morning after fixing our hair and putting on our make-up we headed over to the hotel restaurant for our much anticipated full breakfast buffet.  We would not be disappointed.  Everything was wonderful and the coffee was amazing.  Getting back to the room we had about an hour and a half left giving Carol a little more time to review before packing up and heading out.  

The state board was about 5 miles down the road from the hotel... When we were finished with that we traveled about another 5 miles straight down the road to the I-44 on ramp headed back to Tulsa.  Of course we had to stop at Braum's first for a victory cone, especially since it was right on the corner next to the on ramp... and yes... we prayed for our return trip.

Carol  getting ready for the practical part of the Board
Oh yes, lest I forget the whole reason for the trip... the state boards.  Carol did amazingly well.  She sailed through the practical and breezed through the written.  I knew she could do it!  We want to thank all of you who agreed with us in prayer and in a few weeks when she receives her results she will post them on FB so you may all rejoice in her success.

One last note... if you see Carol or I with a purple ribbon in our hair... well, let's just say you may not understand the significance... but we sure do!

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